trans | (no subject)

So the biggest problem I think I have being transgendered, is the self esteem thing.

Because reguardless of not being born a woman nor having begun my transitioning yet, I find I still hold myself to the same standards as people whom were born women. And its bothersome. I mean, being only 20, and the teenage years I spent knowing I wanted to be a woman, its a very self-esteem damaging time. And so I get hard on myself when I'm not the same weight that women my age and size ought to be, or that my skin isn't as smooth and radiant as a woman's might be ((this is the complex I'm having right now, having spent 20 minutes getting ready for work and making sure my eyeshadow doesn't migrate down my face)).

I dunno.

It sounds emo but it isn't supposed to be haha. How many others had to deal with comparing yourself perhaps unfairly or still do?

And if anyone has any beauty secrets feel free to share.