Problems with my voice

[martinanonymous.livejournal.com]

I've been on testosterone for four-and-a-half years. Within the first year, my voice dropped from soprano range to baritone range. While I cannot hit the low notes true basses can (and have difficulties with the lowest notes in baritone range), I also cannot hit the high notes a tenor can (or even a trained baritone can). So while my voice isn't the lowest out there, it certainly isn't that high - even for a guy.

Nevertheless, people who hear my voice frequently ma'am me. This doesn't happen with people I know, but with strangers. Sometimes they do this even though they know my name is Martin. They never correct themselves, even when they look up and see that I have short hair, facial hair, and a flat chest. It is possible that I sometimes misunderstand them and they're really saying "man," but I doubt that this happens often. Why would a customer service agent say "man" to me? Especially in the beginning of a conversation?

I'm guessing my problem lies with my inflection and resonance. The misgendering happens more often when I'm unsure of myself or am trying to be polite or non-aggressive. I think I subconsciously raise the pitch of my voice in those situations. The misgendering also happens at other times, so I'm guessing the feminine vocal patterns I finally learned at age 14 have stuck with me.

Does anyone else have this problem? How do I retrain my voice without damaging it? Will I eventually be able to speak in a more masculine way without having to think about it? (Right now I can't change much even when I think about it.)

Crossposted to ftmen  and transgender