trans | Up periscope

Hi all, I think I've been here too long without an introduction. I'm a male-bodied (sort of.. see below) MTF in my early thirties. I've had the usual unhappiness with myself for as long as I can remember, but until this year I kept it utterly secret and have done my best to repress it. I came out to my SO this year, who's been totally supportive and encouraging, which is wonderful. However, that just leaves the entire rest of the world to talk to, which is a pretty terrifying thought. I'm going to do it, but I get panic attacks just thinking about it.

There's also another mystery I'm trying to get to the bottom of.. Along with gender identity problems, I have a bunch of odd physiological symptoms. My puberty kind of ground to a halt at 15 or 16, and apart from slowly getting hairier, nothing else happened. I'm extremely lightly built, and never developed male hands or shoulders, or any muscle mass at all. Small shirts and women's gloves fit me fine, despite being six feet tall. My voice only half-broke and still cracks all the time like a teenager. When I started gaining a bit of weight, all the fat ended up in my thighs and bum and made finding pants that fit properly nearly impossible..

Now, I've never heard of any of this mentioned in any reading I've done on transgenderism. None of these things run in my family. My doctor is doing many many tests, but it's incredibly slow. Speculating in a vacuum is futile and frustrating. Does anyone have a similar story, or know someone who does? Maybe it would help to piece the puzzle together.