trans | similarities and differences between MTF and FTM transition

disclaimer: I don't mean to imply that there is only one "MTF experience" and only one "FTM experience." I'm just looking for discussion that might find some common ground, but that might also point to differences that we might learn from them.

This post came about after a long conversation I had with a friend of mine who is running an FTM support group, and who was contemplating expanding the group's scope to involve MTFs, too. He said a lot of the issues on his agenda would pertain to both groups; things like coming out, dealing with family, financing transition, stealth vs. out, etc.

I pointed out that a number of things are different. For example, I know far fewer FTMs who were asked by their therapists to undergo a "real-life test." Also, I believe it's far more likely that an FTM would be able to pass, and live life as a man without medical intervention -- I don't know of any post-pubescent MTFs who are no-ho, no-op, no-electrolysis/laser, and passing and living full-time (though I could well be wrong).

We chatted about these possible differences until at one point I said, "... and I think as far as passing is concerned, most transwomen have a harder time" at which point he gave me a funny look. He lives in Asia, where he said it's the (often very slight) transguys who have a more difficult time of it; he knows guys who have been for T on years and still have very feminine facial structures and no facial hair. In contrast, he said nearly all the transwomen he knows over there are magazine-cover gorgeous.

So that was a good lesson about my cultural bias, eh?

Anyway, about starting some discussion on the topic at hand, one question in particular that springs to mind is the possible similarity between wearing a gaff and wearing a binder.

From a recent post on

boyinvictus' journal:
Why am I so dysphoric about my breasts, and hardly at all about my genitals? Perhaps if I had to walk around all day with my genitals protruding through my clothing signifying me as a woman, they would bother me. It's been theorized (Kessler & McKenna) that being female is often seen more as being "not male," or more specifically that the lack of the penis may be noticed before the presence of a vagina.

I don't know if that's the case, but I would certainly argue that the condition of having breasts is more significant than that of possessing a male chest; that a male chest is often seen as simply "not having breasts." In terms of signifiers, breasts can be to a woman's sexuality what a penis is to a man's. For whatever reason, in western society, "outies" - breasts and penises - get noticed, and count for more than "innies." I've often wondered if this might explain why some symptoms of my breast dysphoria can so closely mirror the penis dysphoria experienced by some transsexual women. [c.f. Venus Envy webcomic, whose site happens to be down, or I would post a more specific link to a few strips in a recent storyline.]

What do you folks think? Let's get some discussion going!