trans | Questions to help me explore the future (Reply)

Hello everybody! I'm a 21-year old MTF. I don't remember if I've posted here before or not... but I've been watching for quite awhile (using my primary LJ... just joined the community using this one).

Over the course of the past year, I've been getting more and more unhappy with my obviously-male body (though I've been told by some bio-girls who had no idea that I have a male body in the pictures that they saw that I have a really girly body). This is obviously doing WONDERS for my self-esteem (it's super-low). I want to explore transitioning "options". I also have quite a few questions I was hoping some of you would know the answer to and could help me.

The two things that are keeping me from starting any kind of trans-therapy at the moment is:
1) My Conservative, Catholic, Chinese parents.
2) Money.

I'm thinking I could begin soon, while still living at home and hopefully hide the changes until I absolutely can't hide anything anymore. Like, if I were allowed the green light for HRT, and the physical changes start to take effect, I could like... bind my breasts to hide them from my parents when I'm at home. But I could still wear the clothes I'm wearing right now (though I get the feeling my hips'll get bigger... so I just have to buy bigger pants). But what I'd like to know from you people with experience:

1) I realize voice doesn't change much, but does the hormones affect voice AT ALL?

2) Have any of you actually had to bind while at home to hide your changes? Have *your* parents noticed anything?

3) Did it hurt to bind while you're growing your breasts (your chest does get more sensitive, correct?)?

4) If you did live with your parents while hiding your changes, How long (not necessarily amount of time, could be in terms of "stages") did it take for them to notice?

5) Were/Are there instances where there have been some "accidents" (they see you, you left something lying around by accident, etc)

6) Aside from the redistribution of fat to my hips and thighs(/arms?), are there any other physical changes that would happen? Any changes to my face that would happen (any changes at all)?

7) Is it possible to predict how large my breats will be when fully developed? Or can I just look at the women in my family and approximate?

8) Branching off of question #3 and #7, I think my mom (when she was younger) was a B-cup, and my sister is a C-cup. If I do get to be a C-cup, how much would binding them hurt?

9) Are there any other things that I should know about?

There's also the question of money. Obviously, I'd be paying for it myself, and I don't think it's covered by my student medical plan (I'd have to check, though). I realise it varies from person to person (or rather, place to place), but:

1) Does anybody know approximately how much it would all cost?
Like, therapy and hormones and everything. I also realize that time is a factor... but I have no idea how much one session of therapy costs. Or how much one month worth of Spiro (or whatever else) costs.

2) Anyone know if it's covered by Canada's MSP at all?

3) Would it show up in my medical insurance records?
My parents usually keep track of the medical bills... I'm worried they'll find out about all these new perscriptions I'd be getting...

4) I'm honestly not sure (at this moment) where to start. I only know that I'll have to do some therapy sessions... could THOSE be covered by MSP or my student plan (I guess I'd have to check by myself for that one)? How many sessions (on average) would I need in order to actually start HRT?

5) There's also a *chance* I might be moving across the country for school for Fall 2008.. or sometime in the future. How would I/What would I need to do (when the time comes) to change doctors or whatever? What do I need to know?

I have a couple general questions, also:
1) Is it true that the earlier you start HRT, the better the results?
I'm 21 - almost 22 in a few months - right now. I started puberty when I was 9, and my "pubescent years" pretty much finished when I was about 17 or earlier (maybe 15).

2) I have quite a bit of fat that has accumulated around my midsection (it's not a beer gut - I don't drink beer =P ). When taking hormones, would that fat be re-distributed to the other parts of my body? Or would the fat stay?

3) Swimming. I like to go every now and then (though it can be sacrificed). How did you deal with it while developing? Going topless is out of the question, but isn't wearing a bikini/swimsuit also?

4) Libido. I know that hormones will definitely affect my libido: less frequent erections (bah. they're so *annoying*!), and whatnot. But will I be able to get an erection if I tried? Could I still ejaculate? If I could, what would come out?

I'm sure I have other questions, but that's "the few" that's been on my mind.
Sorry for the long post!
Thanks!

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