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Oct. 14th, 2004 11:01 pm![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
pure-brooke.livejournal.com posting in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png){kind=small}
transI'm new to this community.
I recently joined because my fiance is transgendered, he was born female.
I don't have a problem with his gender. He is starting hormones soon and still has the female body but that doesn't bother me so much, although I will be happy when he has had the operation but more for him than me.
The problems I have are with other people. I recently met his family and some of his friends when I went to stay with him and although I knew that his son calls him Mum and his family call him by his female name and refer to him as she, I wasn't quite prepared for it.
It doesn't bother me so much that his son calls him mum, he is only six. It doesn't even bother me that much that his parents and sister call him her. Although there was one point where his sister was talking about him and because she was calling him her I got really confused for a couple of minutes before realising who she was talking about. I can imagine it is really hard for them to get used to the fact that he is a man, even if I think they could make more of an effort.
The thing that really bothers me is that he has a friend and she still refers to hiim as her half sister (he was married to her brother). I haven't met her yet, but I had a conversation about her with him and a friend of his. He has even said to her if you can't call me brother just call me sibling but she won't and it really annoys me. I understand that it is hard for her when she's known him as a girl but she is making no effort at all.
I'm worried that I'll end up arguing with her. I find it very hard to hide my annoyance and if she calls him sister in front of me I will probably start an argument or just leave the room. I get offended by it when he is going through so much to look on the outside how he is on the inside and she won't even support him.
Any comments or advice would be appreciated.
Thanks :)
Brooke.
I recently joined because my fiance is transgendered, he was born female.
I don't have a problem with his gender. He is starting hormones soon and still has the female body but that doesn't bother me so much, although I will be happy when he has had the operation but more for him than me.
The problems I have are with other people. I recently met his family and some of his friends when I went to stay with him and although I knew that his son calls him Mum and his family call him by his female name and refer to him as she, I wasn't quite prepared for it.
It doesn't bother me so much that his son calls him mum, he is only six. It doesn't even bother me that much that his parents and sister call him her. Although there was one point where his sister was talking about him and because she was calling him her I got really confused for a couple of minutes before realising who she was talking about. I can imagine it is really hard for them to get used to the fact that he is a man, even if I think they could make more of an effort.
The thing that really bothers me is that he has a friend and she still refers to hiim as her half sister (he was married to her brother). I haven't met her yet, but I had a conversation about her with him and a friend of his. He has even said to her if you can't call me brother just call me sibling but she won't and it really annoys me. I understand that it is hard for her when she's known him as a girl but she is making no effort at all.
I'm worried that I'll end up arguing with her. I find it very hard to hide my annoyance and if she calls him sister in front of me I will probably start an argument or just leave the room. I get offended by it when he is going through so much to look on the outside how he is on the inside and she won't even support him.
Any comments or advice would be appreciated.
Thanks :)
Brooke.