Something that has begun to haunt me

[trannyboi-lb.livejournal.com]

The subject is two fold but the pieces fit together. One of those pieces is the fact that many lesbians and transmen have a physical condition called PolyCystic Ovary Syndrome (PCOS). Now my interest in this started with MiLady and I have a conversation one day and somehow I mentioned that I had been diagnosed with PCOS and she said, "Well that explains it." and when I asked what, she went on to tell me that many of the lesbians and transmen that she has known also were diagnosed with PCOS. So, it intrigued me then but not until I started reading Patrick Califia's "Sex Changes, Transgender Politics" did I begin to really put some foundation to what MiLady had said. It wasn't that I didn't believe her just that here was corroborating information and I was hooked. MiLady and I had continued since that day of our first conversation on the subject to talk on it from time to time but it started again in earnest after starting Patrick's book. So I started questioning what role Testosterone or other masculinizing hormones or substances might have in PCOS and the eventual realization that one is lesbian or trans. So far, (I haven't started my Internet research in earnest yet) the books I have seen don't make any mention of Testosterone or of gender or sexual preference differences in women with PCOS but there has to be something to it. So I am definitely going to be investigating this deeply.

The other subject is finding out how many transpeople ignore the reality of their biological selves and don't get the proper treatment for conditions related to their biology. I realize that in many ways I am an anamoly. I am very well adjusted to the idea that my body is female whether I am totally happy with that or not and that I have to take care of it. I am also adjusted enough to allow myself to enjoy that body in certain circumstances that seem to slow down other transpeople. It saddens me to find out that HIV/AIDS is rampant in the trans community and that people don't take care of their physical/sexual selves because of "hating" their bodies. I understand being unhappy but hating myself to the point of deeply hurting myself or neglecting myself isn't something I am comfortable with.

So these are the subjects that have been on my mind a lot lately. They dovetail in that many transmen with PCOS don't try to get help for it. I can't use the help they offer. Birth control pills cause me to be loonier than a 3 toed sloth on speed so I am left with few options. I just wish that more people could find a happy space within themselves where they can take care of their biological selves while trying to change to who they feel themselves to be.

LB