Detransition, anyone?
Mar. 30th, 2006 12:15 pm![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
radargrrl.livejournal.com posting in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png){kind=small}
transI posted this last night after a disastrous meeting at a support group local to Ottawa, Gender Mosaic. I would urge anybody and everybody of a TS bent, i.e. not a dresser, to avoid this poisonous bunch.
*****
I have just had the crappiest evening I have had in a long long time.
This evening was the monthly Gender Mosaic discussion group. For those that don't know, GM is one of the T* support groups in the Ottawa area. Where it was once the only game in town, it has ceased to be as such, and now caters mostly to the part time 'dresser crowd. Tonight, the topic was, in a nutshell, "Do you like who you are?", with a clarification that followed, "Do you like the person that surgery has made (for you post-ops) or will make (for you pre-ops) you become". As it had been a while since I went to one of these, and had to re-up my membership anyway, I decided to go.
Big mistake!
At one point in the discussion, I brought up the point that FTMs were able to blend much better than MTFs, and without my having the chance to clarify that, because it needed much clarification, the partner of one of the better known GM members stuck her head in from the next room and proceeded to tear me down and negate my entire identity, saying that I would never be seen as anything but a man, that I would never be a woman, that she sees me as a man when she sees me walking down the street...you get the picture. In other words, this woman, who has been a part of the Ottawa gender community for eons, thanks to her support of her partner, managed in a five minute lecture to tear me apart COMPLETELY!
Once she shut up and left, I could not continue. I got up and left as quickly as I could and went home completely distraught.
So what's it to be? So much for the support of this so-called support group! I sure as hell didn't need this tonight! If I'm an utter failure as a woman after two years of trying, I might as well detransition. But I already know that doesn't work, so, really, what's the point in continuing at all? I haven't an answer to this at the moment.
Meanwhile, I've unsubscribed from their mailing list and sent notice of my membership cancellation.
A close friend (who's probably reading this at some point), also had a falling out with this bunch a while back, and disconnected herself completely. I can't help but wonder about similarities.
*****
I have just had the crappiest evening I have had in a long long time.
This evening was the monthly Gender Mosaic discussion group. For those that don't know, GM is one of the T* support groups in the Ottawa area. Where it was once the only game in town, it has ceased to be as such, and now caters mostly to the part time 'dresser crowd. Tonight, the topic was, in a nutshell, "Do you like who you are?", with a clarification that followed, "Do you like the person that surgery has made (for you post-ops) or will make (for you pre-ops) you become". As it had been a while since I went to one of these, and had to re-up my membership anyway, I decided to go.
Big mistake!
At one point in the discussion, I brought up the point that FTMs were able to blend much better than MTFs, and without my having the chance to clarify that, because it needed much clarification, the partner of one of the better known GM members stuck her head in from the next room and proceeded to tear me down and negate my entire identity, saying that I would never be seen as anything but a man, that I would never be a woman, that she sees me as a man when she sees me walking down the street...you get the picture. In other words, this woman, who has been a part of the Ottawa gender community for eons, thanks to her support of her partner, managed in a five minute lecture to tear me apart COMPLETELY!
Once she shut up and left, I could not continue. I got up and left as quickly as I could and went home completely distraught.
So what's it to be? So much for the support of this so-called support group! I sure as hell didn't need this tonight! If I'm an utter failure as a woman after two years of trying, I might as well detransition. But I already know that doesn't work, so, really, what's the point in continuing at all? I haven't an answer to this at the moment.
Meanwhile, I've unsubscribed from their mailing list and sent notice of my membership cancellation.
A close friend (who's probably reading this at some point), also had a falling out with this bunch a while back, and disconnected herself completely. I can't help but wonder about similarities.
