Oh happy day

[stacis-leak.livejournal.com]

I had a fantastic weekend.

It's odd that last weekend and this weekend involved all the same people and all the same places and - to a degree- pretty much the same events.

The only difference was that this weekend wasn't in boymode at all at any point.

Now you may recall that last weekend I was quite depressed by the end of proceedings, feeling like an outsider, trapped in a shit body which the world would ever associate with me.

This weekend was just fun, and it wasthe first time I've ever been really really really myself. I mean I feel quite guarded usually, when disguised as a guy I try not to come across as girly which could be mistaken for (god forbid) campness.
Similarly however I have felt a little pressure - and I know you're going to hate me for this - to act less intelligent when out as a girl.

Now before I get bashed by feminists and MWMF attendees I want to explain that last sentence. There are aspects of my personality which are a little out there. As I said in last weekends depressed post, a lot of the time it seems that to be accepted as a woman I have to fit the cookie cutter ideal of femininity, trying to avoid things which are out of the ordinary.

One particular habit of mine is frothing madly over science and maths. Combine this with the fact that I have to really concentrate to even keep a passable voice (in my opionion. I'm told by others that my voice is rather passablewhen I'm not paying attention, but I don't notice because... um... I'm not paying attention) and you realise why often if I'm in public and not in boymode I keep my mouth shut.

This weekend however I wasn't having any of that nonsense. It came across most (I think) in Pizza Hut, when there were two conflicting offers. We could either get a combo deal for GBP20 with 2 pizzas, 2 sides and a bottle of drink, or if we took everything at regular price we could save 25%.

Enter the almost French and Saunders style bickerings of me and Andy.

"We'd save more with that deal?"
"How?"
"This one here says plus GBP1.50 for stuffed crusts. But that's the same when you buy a regular pizza. So if you take the meal deal you pay and extra GBP3 for the crusts. Whereas with the 25% it's 25% off everything, so you only pay 3/4 of that GBP3."
"But this one has the sides."
"You're right.. how muchare they?"
"They vary from GBP2.50 to GBP4"
"We'd have to work it out on a case by case basis."
"Or just call it GBP3.50 and figure a rough average to work by"
"Good idea... hm..."
*I turn to the server who is staring at us in bewilderment "Do you have a calculator?"

Later I also gave Andy a brief summary of methods and modes of time travel with their various advantages, disadvantages and quirks.

Later still I gave him a dressing down on his high level ways by discussing the best way to store location and character information for a graphical MMORPG.

My webserver (for when the site is finally runnning) is called Nirdgerl, a semi-spoonerism on Nerd and Girl, which are the two most defining adjectives I tend to apply to myself.

Last weekend I felt like neither. This weekend I felt like both and much more besides.


Now some facts I didn't know before.

1) When Cathy first met me, I was in boymode having just come straight out of work and her first thought on seeing me was that I must have been incredibly brave to have pulled through cancer without letting affect my cheery outlook. To clarify, her first assumption was that I must have had a total mastectomy.

2) Apparently no one in Cathy's house actually knew I was trans until I blurted it out when I was drunk earlier this year. Additionally many of them still have a hard time believing I'm not a GG, especially Izzy who didn't even think I looked the slightest bit masculine last week when I was feeling rough and didn't bother with my ordinarily heavily bra all weekend.

This is crossposted from stacis_leak for happiness factor.