New SOFFA here..
Nov. 24th, 2007 03:16 pm![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
cripfemme.livejournal.com posting in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png){kind=small}
transDear Everyone,
I've had transgender friends before but they were already transitioned when we met. That is easier for me to deal with. Recently one of my very best friends as well as my ex-girlfriend came out to me. My best friend is transitioning from male to female, and my ex-girlfriend identifies as gender variant. I have no idea what to do with these two people, although I am interested in being an ally, I have no idea how to do this, and worry about getting it wrong.
But I am also extremely offended, as both of them assumed that I wasn't going to be their friend anymore. One of these people has known me half my life. I wanted to ask if they'd left their brain on their pillow that morning. I know that a bunch of people have told me that they weren't actually talking about me and just wanted reassurance, but I am still offended. And this makes me a bad ally, because I can't get past my anger to help them with whatever they might need help with, and I can't even figure out what that is.
This is probably the most inarticulate thing I've ever written in my life, but I am very confused and have no idea what to even say. I also have a major concern because my ex-significant other is now apparently not female anymore, and does this make me straight? I hope not because I really don't want to go through that process again, coming out was hard enough the first time! I am trying to be supportive, really I am, but I am kind of lost.
Thanks for reading.
I've had transgender friends before but they were already transitioned when we met. That is easier for me to deal with. Recently one of my very best friends as well as my ex-girlfriend came out to me. My best friend is transitioning from male to female, and my ex-girlfriend identifies as gender variant. I have no idea what to do with these two people, although I am interested in being an ally, I have no idea how to do this, and worry about getting it wrong.
But I am also extremely offended, as both of them assumed that I wasn't going to be their friend anymore. One of these people has known me half my life. I wanted to ask if they'd left their brain on their pillow that morning. I know that a bunch of people have told me that they weren't actually talking about me and just wanted reassurance, but I am still offended. And this makes me a bad ally, because I can't get past my anger to help them with whatever they might need help with, and I can't even figure out what that is.
This is probably the most inarticulate thing I've ever written in my life, but I am very confused and have no idea what to even say. I also have a major concern because my ex-significant other is now apparently not female anymore, and does this make me straight? I hope not because I really don't want to go through that process again, coming out was hard enough the first time! I am trying to be supportive, really I am, but I am kind of lost.
Thanks for reading.
