A conversation at work
Jul. 23rd, 2010 03:26 pm![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
halfbloodme.livejournal.com posting in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png){kind=small}
transI work as a teaching assistant at a primary school and today was our last day before the holidays. When out on the extra long playtime after assembly, one of the kids in year 3 came up to me and gave me a hug, nothing unusual there until said kid and their sister who is in year 5 started having a conversation.
Sister: I like that Miss Emery is a girl, she's very huggy.
Me in thought: I'm not a girl but we won't go into that now.
Kid: Why do you say Miss Emery is a girl. She could be a boy like me.
Me in thought: Not a boy either but thank you.
Sister: You're a GIRL. Your name is Caitlin*.
Kid: No I'm a boy.
Sister: Mum says you're a girl, you have the same bits I do, you're a girl. Yeah you're a tomboy, but you're a girl.
Kid: Dad calls me Charlie and I like Charlie better. I'm NOT a girl.
Sister: Mum says Dad is an idiot for agreeing to call you Charlie*.
Kid: When I turn 11 I'm moving in with Dad.
Me: Come on now kids, lets try and enjoy the last day of the school year and not argue.
Sister: Miss, will you tell Caitlin she's a girl?
Me (whilst trying to remain neutral and not cause a full scale riot when the kids are picked up and their mother finds out I'm not going to force their child to conform to a gender or sex): It's not up to me. Caitlin or Charlie, whichever you prefer is what I'll call you.
Kid: Yay thank you Miss.
Sister: I think adults are weird.
(*names changed to protect identities in line with the data protection act)
Working in school (whilst my ideal job), is very cisexual and cisgender biased, I've yet to find a gender neutral title that the kids can use and that won't out me to parents and cause a riot, although I'm working on it. I've so far learned how to deal with questions of boyfriends (I am attracted to women), how to deal with questions on why I won't wear dresses and got my hair cut short and why I don't dress like a girl or like a boy but a mixture. Now it's a case of learning how to deal with situations like the above and stay neutral whilst carefully avoiding fitting into the hetronormative and the sexual and gender normative positions most of our parents and the other staff take. This year has been a real learning curve.
Sister: I like that Miss Emery is a girl, she's very huggy.
Me in thought: I'm not a girl but we won't go into that now.
Kid: Why do you say Miss Emery is a girl. She could be a boy like me.
Me in thought: Not a boy either but thank you.
Sister: You're a GIRL. Your name is Caitlin*.
Kid: No I'm a boy.
Sister: Mum says you're a girl, you have the same bits I do, you're a girl. Yeah you're a tomboy, but you're a girl.
Kid: Dad calls me Charlie and I like Charlie better. I'm NOT a girl.
Sister: Mum says Dad is an idiot for agreeing to call you Charlie*.
Kid: When I turn 11 I'm moving in with Dad.
Me: Come on now kids, lets try and enjoy the last day of the school year and not argue.
Sister: Miss, will you tell Caitlin she's a girl?
Me (whilst trying to remain neutral and not cause a full scale riot when the kids are picked up and their mother finds out I'm not going to force their child to conform to a gender or sex): It's not up to me. Caitlin or Charlie, whichever you prefer is what I'll call you.
Kid: Yay thank you Miss.
Sister: I think adults are weird.
(*names changed to protect identities in line with the data protection act)
Working in school (whilst my ideal job), is very cisexual and cisgender biased, I've yet to find a gender neutral title that the kids can use and that won't out me to parents and cause a riot, although I'm working on it. I've so far learned how to deal with questions of boyfriends (I am attracted to women), how to deal with questions on why I won't wear dresses and got my hair cut short and why I don't dress like a girl or like a boy but a mixture. Now it's a case of learning how to deal with situations like the above and stay neutral whilst carefully avoiding fitting into the hetronormative and the sexual and gender normative positions most of our parents and the other staff take. This year has been a real learning curve.