(no subject)

[venusarani.livejournal.com]

Hi, I just joined this community and wanted to post a quick message..my name is Elizabeth and I am (I think) a MtF transsexual...I've always questioned whether I was TS or just a crossdresser, but I'm leaning more towards the former. I'm in my early 20's in Florida and live with my fiance (female) who knows about and encourages my femme side. I have made no attempt to live full time nor do I plan any sort of hormones or SRS...but I do feel more female than male and like to express that as much as possible.

Gender Tabla Rasa

[ex-hotelyorb175.livejournal.com]

My early-morning response to blu_dragonfly's very valid argument on rearing children without any gender expectations (it was too long for the 'comment' box, hee hee).

I agree that raising a child with gender preconceptions is wrong and may bias their views, but starting with a completely "clean slate", as it were, is probably more confusing in the long run. Essentially, this is an excellent idea in theory, but putting it into practice is nearly impossible. In order for it to truly work, the entire planet would have to adhere to raising children as androgynous beings, and this would definitely be a rather drastic and non-constitutional tenet to set into motion.

( I go on and on and on... )

Sign O' times

[deanza17.livejournal.com]

I'm thinking about transitioning to male (I think I will continue to keep my queer-sexual identity though), I'm just contemplating if living/presenting/relating to and being related to as male would make me feel more complete, more whole and honest in my life. I'm going back and forth on this and don't know if I ever will decide to do anything, but I want to keep my options open as well as my mind. I don't enjoy living as a woman and don't identify as one, though unfortunately if you're female (even butch) in society most people automatically think you are a woman (unfortunately sex and gender are inseparable in mainstream society, ain't life a b!tch?) -- something I'm not comfortable with at all! So, I decided to jot down the pro's and cons of transitioning and maybe in the process get some tips/advice.

The upside:
1) In many ways, I will feel happier and much more comfortable in my skin.
(I don't feel comfortable with seeing "female" in the mirror, I don't feel comfortabe with binding or packing, I don't feel comfortable with my breasts. I hate that I need to surgerically alter myself to be what I feel I am inside, but it's the only way.)
2) It will be easier for me to live, I'm not that happy even going out now and I tend to stay in the house as much as I can to avoid facing the world.
3) I feel it would help me tremendously with my self-esteem and depression, as well as confidence. Just being comfortable with what I see in the mirror and what others see would help me a great deal in those area's.
4) I would finally be able to move forward with my life, at this rate I'm way behind everything and procrastinate most of the time because I'm so desperately unhappy with myself.
5) I would finally be able to be honest with people and with myself.
6) It would be nice to finally feel as though my inner and outer self are in line.

the downside:
1) Giving up the security of the only gender I've known in society (since I don't pass), and having to adapt to a gender which may feel foreign to me, although I do feel it best reflects who I am.
2) I keep feeling as though I'm not giving myself enough time to just be me and maybe I would be happy in "girl mode" if... I've tried this a number of times and it failed, but I always have this gut feeling that maybe I didn't give myself enough time with it.
3) Money -- it takes a whole lot of money to physically and legally transition. I don't currently have it, so if I transition it will be a long process.
4) Bottom surgery: I'm not that happy with the latest procedures regarding bottom surgery and I'm not sure if I would want to have it or not, if I opt not to, is it something I can live with?
5) Time: I have little to no patience at this time in my life and fully transitioning takes time, it can take a few mouths to many years, I'm I strong enough emotionally to be able to handle that?
6) Dating is going to be harder and finding a woman who is into tguys, I'm assuming is a hell of alot harder, at least I think so. I may be hurting myself in the romance department if I decide to transition. It's difficult enough to find a femme who is interested in butches.

Any advice?????

I should add that I'm out to my family and their supportive, though some are not very understanding, but if I transition I will have support and love. Also I have an appointment with Callen-Lord (a local GLBT community health center on April 9th and this is scary to me for some reason)

I feel like such a wuss :(

HELP!!

[ckssunshine.livejournal.com]

okay I wear just a shirt under my binder and you knowa short over that but after I take it off my nipples HURT! they're like swollen or something it goes away after a few minutes
what am I doing wrong? or is this normal?

owwie...

-Connor
sorry for the cross posting