work questions

[stainedapril.livejournal.com]

hey guys. my ftm boyfriend is trying to come out at work. he is going to be a supervisor this season and so was preparing a letter to other supervisors explaining his name change (not legal) since last summer. the people directly above him are awesome and understanding. however, the people in human relations say that shea, legally sarah, cannot have such a "nickname" on his nametag, due to legal stuff, and that he must use the women's restroom (only sexual orientation is in their non-discrimination policy, not gender identity/expression). although he is not on t, he passes quite often as is and he's hoping to start t before or during this summer. he could change his name legally, but is worried that that may cause problems with health insurance being willing to cover his transition later on. he's been working the same place for years now and really adores the people he directly works with. human relations apparently has final say, though. i'm thinking it might be better for him to be happy and comfortable with how he's known in a lower-paying and possibly more dull job. i don't know.

so. my questions are these: has anyone else had similar issues with names at work? is there any way around this? does anyone know about name changes in relation to health insurance and coverage of transition?

thank you SO much for your help. he's really stressed about this and i hate to see him so unhappy.

cross-posted to a few ftm/soffa communities