Gender and Dating
Jul. 26th, 2005 12:32 pm![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
foxxygirltamara.livejournal.com posting in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png){kind=small}
transEver wish you could go back?
For those who were out as queer before coming out as trans, do you ever miss your old life? I still have a strong attraction to gay bois and whereas I could act on that before, I can't now. I've heard a couple guys who were out as lesbian before transition say they still feel close to the "dyke" identity. I know plenty of girls think boys kissing boys is hot but I used to be one of those boys. Sometimes I wish I could be a boy again just for a while. I'd much rather live my life as a girl but I wish everyone was available... *frustration*
Who likes trans people?
But who dates us? I know a couple guys who are dating straight women who have never been with another trans guy but the only guys I see for girls are chasers (with the exception of trans guys I know who are dating trans girls). What's up with that? And then I get bashed on the other side by dykes who reject me because my bits and pieces are different. I'm currently dating another trans girl and that works out just fine (and I can steal spiro or estro from her when I run out ^_^). Bi people aren't necessarily attracted to trans/gq people anymore than other people, so who do you look for when you're looking for potential partners? How do I know if someone likes me for me or is just fetishizing me?
When do you out yourself?
I just date among my friends but I also like to cruise OkCupid and MySpace for potential friends or partners in my area. If I say I'm "bi", I just get lots of guys messaging me. If I mention I'm trans, I get lots of creepy chasers guys. But if I don't say I'm trans then I weird people out when I tell them. *sigh* How do you present it? (I know chasers are pretty much a problem for trans women and not men but the question of how, when and if you mention your trans status is still the same).
For those who were out as queer before coming out as trans, do you ever miss your old life? I still have a strong attraction to gay bois and whereas I could act on that before, I can't now. I've heard a couple guys who were out as lesbian before transition say they still feel close to the "dyke" identity. I know plenty of girls think boys kissing boys is hot but I used to be one of those boys. Sometimes I wish I could be a boy again just for a while. I'd much rather live my life as a girl but I wish everyone was available... *frustration*
Who likes trans people?
But who dates us? I know a couple guys who are dating straight women who have never been with another trans guy but the only guys I see for girls are chasers (with the exception of trans guys I know who are dating trans girls). What's up with that? And then I get bashed on the other side by dykes who reject me because my bits and pieces are different. I'm currently dating another trans girl and that works out just fine (and I can steal spiro or estro from her when I run out ^_^). Bi people aren't necessarily attracted to trans/gq people anymore than other people, so who do you look for when you're looking for potential partners? How do I know if someone likes me for me or is just fetishizing me?
When do you out yourself?
I just date among my friends but I also like to cruise OkCupid and MySpace for potential friends or partners in my area. If I say I'm "bi", I just get lots of guys messaging me. If I mention I'm trans, I get lots of creepy chasers guys. But if I don't say I'm trans then I weird people out when I tell them. *sigh* How do you present it? (I know chasers are pretty much a problem for trans women and not men but the question of how, when and if you mention your trans status is still the same).