Formal wear and dress codes

[coiledlikestars.livejournal.com]

I was researching some possible things to do with my partner for a big celeberation, and a few things required black tie or other levels of formal wear.

My partner is genderqueer; they're read as different genders depending on the context but don't consistently 'pass' as anything. I'm a trans man; when I was early on in my transition, what I thought was typical business or formal attire was seen by other people as crossdressing.

So what is a non-binary person to do about formal wear? How about if you're visibly trans? What kind of reactions have people gotten for wearing the 'wrong' sort of formal wear? Can somewhere with a gendered dress code really police what you wear based on your apparent assigned sex?

(no subject)

[toberin.livejournal.com]

Hey everybody. Was hoping some of you might be interested in signing this
http://www.thepetitionsite.com/1/bill-c-389/
and letting the Canadian government know that transpeople have rights too. You don't have to be Canadian to sign. Also, if you have friends or others that are interested, please pass this link along to them.
Thanks a lot!
X-posted in FTM (and a few other coms)