Transisition vs SOC?

[zoelouise1126.livejournal.com]

Ok.. the ICON picture attached to this post
is ME.. taken at a Mardi Gras Ball on Jan 30th. 2005..

Ok.. when I look at it...
I see a somewhat fat middle aged old woman
in a COSTUME...
( I acutally think I kinda look like my Great AUnt Ursula :-) )

sure it IS a costume...

The pic is not retouched in any way...

but it is still a COSTUME...

Ok.. I have worn dresses and gone out to resturaunts..
I have worn skirts to parties and to Mardi Gras Balls..

But that is NOT the ME... that I feel that I am..


Heck.. most GG women that I know.. my age almost NEVER
wear clothes like that..
I cant even remember the last time I have seen M in a dress..

The women I work with dress just like I do..
Jeans and shirts..
Hell my shirts are much more FEMME than theirs most days.
Today I have on a lovely pink sweater. :-)


I see my therapist next week... I want to talk to her about this...

For me, I have "TRANSISTIONED" from beeing the MAN.. that I
used to pretend to be..
into being the ME>> that I feel comfortable with...

most days I wear pants and a shirt...
my "real" hair is much longer than the wig in that icon picture..

I go around wearing dangling earrings and much jewlery EVERY DAY...

Like I said.. I have TRANSITIONED into the person that I
see myself as...

Ok.. I have worn evening gowns to events that need evening gowns..
I have worn "costumes" to events that need costumes..

But what I am thinking about now.. is the HBSOC..
and the requirement that one "live in role" for one
year....
Hey.. I dress more GIRLY than most GIRLS....
I am "OUT" to most of the people that I deal with
on a day to day basis....
What next.....
To be truely considered "TRANS" do I have to endure
a year of dressing in dresses and skirts???
when virtually NONE of the genetic girls that I know do?

just a thought....

Zoe..